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Sherbert D. Bear
Sherbert is definitely NOT a polar bear who is most certainly NOT from the West Pole. Biography Sherbert was born in Smosh, a small village east of the West Pole, Smosh was a village for walruses, but many flamingos, goats and Nyan cats lived there as well. Sherbert's parents, (a walrus and a swiss cheese) ran away to look for the legendary Loofah of Power when Sherbie was young. She was sent to live with her grandparents, Pervert D. Bear and Harriet the Hatchet Gal, who taught her the arts of earwax sculpting and chainsaw surfing. Sherbert attended home-school, where she met her best friends, Norbert the flamingo, and None the Something from There, who introduced her to bacon flavored pie, which they always snorted during classes. She also met her rival, Cabbage the nacho bear, who frequently stole her lunch and tap danced beneath her window when she was trying to sleep. She and Cabbage often got into fights in the school's broom closet, where they would joust with vegetables while screaming death metal songs at the top of their lungs. Her favorite teacher, Professor Dumbledork, claimed that she was the worst student he had ever had, and he often gave her extra homework, which she absolutely loved. One day, during a math test, Sherbert was mixing smoothies, and accidentally blew up the school's tennis court. She was expelled, and arrested for the murder of an innocent gopher, but was later found to be guilty and was released with a restraining order preventing her from going within ten inches of inflatable whales. At age 18, Sherbert took a job as a narwhal wrangler and part time jet ski pilot. Her boss, Mr. Dinner, frequently made her work an extra shift on Thursdays, which caused her to develop an extreme dislike to both him and the day. She was fired four months later for sniffing markers on the job, and she paintballed Mr. Dinner's igloo out of anger. When Sherbet reached the age of 21, she left Smosh for Pennsylvania, where she met her future husband Lonk, a professional Google searcher and Pintrest hoarder. Lonk taught her that "If you go far enough East, you'll find yourself going North!" And the two of them set off on a 3 day weekend journey to prove this. They were last spotted somewhere near China, where they robbed crack from a native giraffe; ate traditional hamburgers, and magic beans; and destroyed part of the Eiffel Tower. They were then deported from the country, and wandered in the jungles of Siberia for several weeks until they stumbled upon the ruins of Stonehenge, which had recently been relocated due to a construction project. Neither of them has been seen since, and 4 out of 3 dentists agree that they were likely kidnapped by aliens. Recently, Sherbert appeared on an episode of Survivor Man, where Adam Levine interviewed her on important subjects such as the current economical crisis, Kristen Stewart's latest album and the correct way to step on Legos. Sherbert made her dramatic reappearance on June 26, 2015. In honor of the USA's legalization of same-sex marriage, she tap danced on top of the white house while sporting rainbow fur. She was later spotted at a taco restaurant in Colorado. It is currently unknown how she managed to travel there so quickly. On June 10th 2016, nearly a year after her last public appearance, Sherbert and Lonk were spotted wearing Chewbacca masks and dancing to a metal remix of The Emperial March outside of Buckingham Palace. They were arrested for disturbing the peace, and for the murder of Sherlock Holmes, but were later cleared of all charges after it was found that Sherlock wasn't really dead. Later that day, Sherbert was found hiding in Gerard Way's garage. When asked what she was doing there, she responded with, "Looking for the legendary Book of Emo." She was arrested once again and banned from Iceland. She later broke out of prison and is currently on the run from authorities. On October 31st 2016, Sherbert was once again arrested, this time for attempting to break into a convince store in Florida, while dressed as a clown. She was bailed out by Lonk, and the two were later spotted attempting to "make America great again" by hiding behind a wall and throwing candy and pumpkins at random strangers while wearing Donald Trump masks. In March of 2017, Sherbert was banned from the internet for refusing to stop making Harambe memes, and for spamming people with images of Leo DiCaprio drinking Capri Sun. In protest, she is holding a march for chickens in Lick Skillet, Tennessee on February 30th 2087. In January 2018, Sherbert purchased 30 pou nds of garlic bread, 69 polaroid cameras, and a cardboard cutout of Brent Spiner and disappeared into the woods with the intention of photographing the illusive forest elves. She returned 3 days later, with torn clothes, a concussion, and a high quality photo of bigfoot's arse. She refuses to talk about what happened. As of the 30th of August 2017, Sherbert has killed over a dozen people. These include: *A Swedish peasant, over a fight of the best number (Sherbert voted bleventeen whilst the Swede insisted it was -17) *Two ginger hippos *Six math teachers *Charlie Duncan *Sherlock Holmes *Mariah Carey's career *The entire cast of Riverdale *Herbert Quotes *"E equals MC rectangular which means HAMBURGERS!" -Sherbert on the current economical crisis *"Puffins are like potato chips, they're both crunchy and never give you free money..." -Sherbert talking about her cousin's friends's uncle's dog's neighbor's friend's wedding. *"This Miley Bieber girl, she totally looks like a combination of Elsa, Nicki Minaj, that banjo player from Maroon 5 and a camel!" -Sherbie on Kirsten Stewart's latest album. *"RAAAAAAAAINBOWS!!!!!" -Sherbert 's June 26th speech. *''"Did a cat puke on your head or are you a moth possesed by a cheeto?"''-Sherbert interviewing Donald Trump Trivia *She has a habit of frequently changing colors to match her food. *Sherbert married her husband Lonk on February 31st 2019 in Hell, Michigan. *After extensive family searching, Sherbert discovered she is related to many important historical figures, including George Washington, Billie Joe Armstrong, the inventor of toaster strudel, and Kim Kardashian (but strangely, none of her siblings). *She has a rare form of lycanthropy, which causes her to turn into a human whenever the new moon falls on a Friday. Gallery Sherbie-dance.gif|Sherbert dancing Illubert.gif|Sherbert hiding from the Illuminati sher3.PNG|Sherbert's human form Category:Jokes Category:Bears Category:Clones Category:Females Category:Civilians Category:Pixie's Characters